Welcome to The Group Chat with Lucy Manly, where Australia’s most trusted society insider shares the hottest gossip BEFORE it makes the news.
Banker’s text appeal
Etienne Alexiou was once defined by billion-dollar trades.
These days, he’s better known for toe-curling work chat logs – now being read aloud in the Federal Court during his unfair dismissal case – peppered with talk of school-gate ‘MILFs’ and boasts about bedding a soap star.
Alexiou, ANZ’s former global head of balance sheet trading, was dramatically sacked back in 2015.
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ANZ’s former global head of balance sheet trading Etienne Alexiou (right, with wife Berry and their teenage daughter) is undergoing bruising cross-examination in an unfair dismissal case
Bawdy talk of MILFs, Viagra and sleeping with Home and Away stars feature in toe-curling transcripts of Alexiou’s work chat logs
A decade on, his on-and-off court battle with the Big Four bank is still playing out – and his lewd one-liners are being dredged up in open court for all to hear.
In one eyebrow-raising exchange from 2011, he was asked whether any ‘MILFs’ were present at his daughter’s induction to the prestigious Ascham School.
Asked for the acronym’s meaning in court, he spelled it out: ‘Mother I’d like to f***.’
When pressed further, he conceded it was ‘inappropriate’ – especially to his wife and daughters.
Coincidentally, Alexiou’s wife also attended Ascham back in the day. Their daughter, now in her late teens, graduated from there last year.
Another gem from the transcript? Alexiou proudly declared ‘I got laid!!!’ – about his own wife, no less. Charming.
He was also confronted with messages in which he joked about the awkwardness of asking his family GP for Viagra for use outside his marriage.
That’s the kind of toe-curling office overshare that makes you want to close Outlook forever. In the words of barrister Kate Morgan SC, acting for ANZ: ‘To talk about your wife in that way is worse than offensive, isn’t it?’ Alexiou agreed.
I’m not sure what makes me cringe more: Etienne Alexiou’s bawdy office chat or this sprawled- out tanning photo that somehow made its way to social media
He also regaled colleagues with a tale of sleeping with an unnamed Home and Away actress – prompted by a co-worker asking about the ‘oldest bird you have shagged’. And he wrote of being ‘so sick of swiggin dom [Dom Perignon] out of the bottle at strip clubs anyway.’
I should note, Alexiou maintains these messages were mere ‘caricature’ and an attempt at ‘being critical of bankers’.
The best satirists are rarely understood in their lifetime…
Meanwhile, the courtroom quips have earned him an unflattering nickname in banking circles.
‘He is being called “Banker Bruce Lehrmann” because he’s “going back for his hat”,’ a source tells me.
To be clear, the Lehrmann comparison is purely about Alexiou embarrassing himself by pursuing legal action he perhaps shouldn’t have. The two men otherwise have nothing in common.
ANZ insists the father-of-three was sacked over lewd messages. Alexiou claims he was pushed out after blowing the whistle on alleged rate-rigging in the notorious bank bill swap rate (BBSW) scandal – which cost ANZ a reported $50million fine.
So, we’ve all been following the tawdry court case – but who is Etienne Alexiou?
Since getting the boot from ANZ, he has reinvented himself as a director for private equity firm Belay Capital, based in Double Bay.
He also has an impeccably well-connected wife, Berry Alexiou – described by one of my sources as ‘old, old money’.
Berry is the daughter of adman Malcolm Spry and restaurateur Helen Spry, the woman behind 1980s Kings Cross hotspot Chez Oz.
Fitting, really – Etienne’s old chat logs read less like office banter and more like a night at Chez Oz in its champagne-soaked heyday.
In July, the Alexious splashed out on a five-bedroom Woollahra palace
The court case is tipped to run for six weeks, meaning we’re only at the entrée – and Alexiou is serving up sleaze like it’s 1980s Chez Oz.
While you’d be forgiven for thinking Alexiou’s marriage might be suffering under the strain of his eye-watering cross-examination, it seems the couple are doing just fine.
In July, they splashed out on a five-bedroom Woollahra palace, described in its listing as a ‘timeless residence of remarkable grace and grandeur’.
Nice to see things looking up – especially given that back in November 2015, when this saga first erupted, Alexiou had to offload his Point Piper pad for north of $8million, barely 18 months after buying it.
Help for the poor
Spare a thought for former Double Bay wedding planner Kashaya Williams, who’s doing it tough these days – and her friends with deep pockets aren’t rushing to help.
The celebrity-adjacent single mum famously went bankrupt after a bungled fraud scheme involving her late grandfather.
It was quite a setback. Now, insiders tell me Williams, who’s in her late 30s, is asking wealthy pals for a loan to help tide her over.
It’s not exactly pocket change, so it’s no surprise she’s hearing crickets.
Spare a thought for wedding planner Kashaya Williams (right, with ex-husband Evan Williams), who’s doing it tough these days and her friends with deep pockets aren’t rushing to help
Now unable to cover rent, she’s hoping her ritzy contacts will come to the rescue.
Naturally, Williams has promised to pay them back – once she receives a settlement she’s expecting.
Amusingly, while asking for cash, she’s also grumbling that many eastern suburbs types don’t have as much coin as they claim.
It’s a bit rich coming from her. Maybe it hasn’t occurred to Williams that they do have money… they just don’t want to lend it to her.
Williams’ financial history is patchy, to say the least.
She was declared bankrupt for a second time in March and missed her April sentencing for unpaid fines and driving offences.
After failing to appear in court, former neighbours at her Double Bay address said she’d abandoned her three-bedroom Federation home ‘some time ago’.
After several weeks of concern for her welfare, Williams was spotted in late May sipping schooners at The Royal, the ramshackle Bondi pub attached to Totti’s.
She looked single and ready to mingle as she caught up with friends – having previously been linked to crypto entrepreneur Michael Dunworth.
Just months earlier, the mum-of-one suffered a major loss in the Federal Circuit and Family Court in her bid to annul her bankruptcy.
Her case was dismissed with costs incurred on March 27.
According to a judgement seen by the Daily Mail, her bankruptcy was extended to 2032 due to non-compliance.
This is a digital mock-up of the letter Kashaya’s mother, Nerez Grant, claimed to have received from her father, radiologist Dr Alan Grant, in 2016. A court later ruled the signature was forged
She was first declared bankrupt after her family turned on her in a bitter row over her wealthy grandfather’s will.
Relatives of top radiologist Alan Grant, who died aged 98 in 2019, spent years wrangling over his estate after Williams claimed he’d gifted her his $900,000 Killcare home overlooking the Pacific Ocean.
But her uncle, neuroscientist Professor Seth Grant, and her aunt Tansin, successfully took Williams and her mother, Nerez Grant, to court in 2020 to recover the property.
The NSW Supreme Court ruled that the crucial letter giving Williams the home was a forgery and that Williams was ‘a knowing participant in a dishonest scheme’.
Two years ago, it was reported that Williams still owed her grandfather’s estate $754,543.33 from two court judgements against her. It’s unclear how much progress she has made in paying back that debt.
Dinner is served!
After years running swanky kitchens from New York to Sydney, hospitality golden boy and sometime actor Rupert Noffs and chef Matty Bennett – yes, the former Longrain darling – have swapped Michelin-starred menus for mop buckets with their new venture: Australian Maid.
Think of it as the ‘full husband experience’ – they’ll cook dinner, plate it to restaurant standard, and scrub your pans afterwards until they sparkle.
But don’t get too excited, ladies: once dessert is cleared, there’s strictly no funny business. (We wish!)
Hospitality golden boy and sometime actor Rupert Noffs (left) and chef Matty Bennett of Longrain fame have started a new business where they’ll cook for you at home – and clean up!
Between them, the two have cooked for Martha Stewart, Sarah Jessica Parker, Toni Collette and more. Now, they’re bringing New York polish to high-net-worth clients in Sydney’s east
Between them, they’ve cooked for Martha Stewart, Sarah Jessica Parker, Australia’s own Toni Collette and more.
Now back in Sydney’s eastern suburbs, they’re bringing their New York polish to high-net-worth clients and VIP households.
‘We’re known for our attention to detail, discretion, and professionalism,’ Noffs shared on a local Facebook page.
And finally… guess who, don’t sue!
Which principal of a boys’ school took a proactive approach to whispers of a scandal on campus about a decade ago?
Rather than go to police prematurely or cause panic by emailing parents, they brought in a private investigator to dig into the claims.
Perhaps this was for the best: the gumshoe found no evidence of wrongdoing.
I’m told the headmaster also quietly canvassed old boys, all of whom insisted the scurrilous gossip was baseless.
Note: The subjects of this blind item are not mentioned or pictured anywhere else in this column. The school in question is also not mentioned or pictured elsewhere.
Additional reporting by Kinta Walsh-Cotton
